Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Late New Year's Ponderings

Just before Christmas I had a health scare. The kind of health scare that can cause your imagination to take you to all sorts of scary places. And while I had a wonderful vacation and great Christmas, the whole time was underscored by anxiety - waiting for the appointment with the specialist, waiting for the test results, waiting... and while I was doing all that waiting, I found it hard to plan for the new year. I know most people roll their eyes when they hear the term "New Year's Resolution," but I have always liked making plans for a fresh new year, hoping to do a better job at life. But this year I felt more like I was bracing myself for whatever might be ahead, unable to think beyond the test results, and certainly not able to make grand plans for bettering myself.

Well, yesterday I met with the specialist, got the test results, and all of the BAD possibilities were scratched out. Just like that I was in the clear - the new year became a happy reality. But rather than skipping right by what was a very scary and uncomfortable two weeks, I've been taking time to look back rather than forward. First of all, I am so grateful to God that I am healthy. Yes, I have a few minor health issues, but I am not gravely ill, and I am incredibly thankful. Secondly, I am thankful that God draws near to us when we draw near to Him - he promises to do that in the Bible, and I have seen it to be very very true in the last few weeks. That peace that "passes understanding?" - yep, it's for real.

So yes, I have made some plans for the new year, but they are less about what I want and more about what I already have. My marriage. My family. My level of stress and how it affects my kids. Huge things like that which are thrown into the spotlight when you have a scare that puts everything into perspective. I am thankful for those scary two weeks, thankful for a new year, and looking forward to what God has in store for me.


Anonymous said...

i am very THANKFUL along with you, that you are o.k.!!! Those scary waiting times are sooooo hard, but what a joy and release when we receive the good news. like you, i am sooo thankful for relatively good health, hubby, daughter and son in law, family, and good friends, and a roof over my head, and good Christian fellowship. and like you, i do make NY resolutions...i finally wrote 5 down on a sticky tab, and stuck it to my wall calendar! hopefully they will help me move forward!

The Luecks said...

Aww. So glad you received good news and relief. And that it's a Happy New Year. What a great picture. :). Let's get our kids together soon sometime to catch up.

H said...

I'm so glad to hear that everything is ok!